Yes and No
Now and again an outrage floods up in me concerning how horrifyingly this culture guides and deals with its individuals around advances. We anticipate that engaged women and men should put on a cheerful face from the proposition through the wedding trip, overlooking their intrinsic need to lament the deficiency of their singlehood and honor their feelings of trepidation about getting hitched. We hail pregnant ladies and new moms for not permitting their child to meddle with their normal life. (My heart sinks when I see a mother with a multi week old child at the supermarket.) And exactly when the body needs to go internal to dial back or arrive at a stand-still at the year’s end, the way of life coordinates a staggering time loaded up with the outward energy of utilization and mingling.
The subject in my work with customers last week was weariness. Notwithstanding every one of them realizing that their bodies required rest, they singularly communicated that it was so hard to deny the surge of hecticness that characterizes nowadays. “It’s simply overpowering and I’m deciding not to battle it,” one customer shared. “I’m seeing it yet I don’t feel like I can pick against the current.”
We say yes and yes once more. We grin and chuckle and spend and dance, and in the end the body falls on the opposite side of the new year. It might implode as ailment or despondency, yet it will discover an approach to dial you back; it generally does. At the point when we miss the prompts that assist us with adjusting the “yes” with the “no”, our body-mind-intelligence discovers an approach to re-balance for us.
Indeed it is a delightful energy. At the point when you open yourself to yes you’re getting the surge of affection, mindfulness, empathy, giving, and association. Those of us in the aiding callings are normally arranged toward yes as we offer ourselves to seeing and helping and directing others. We are lined up with a yes-stream when we’re providing for other people.
Be that as it may, no is lovely also. What’s more, all together for the surge of yes to come from a decent and full well within you, it should be adjusted by its partner of no. No set limits. No conveys the current of acumen and sound judgment. No is the guard that stands at the door of your heart and tells you when you’re giving excessively. No one says, “I can’t go to the occasion party” and “I can’t prepare natively constructed treats this year; I’ll need to get them at the store.”
Yes or no are twin shafts who meet in the focal point of a full heart. Indeed runs dry without its partner of no, and an excess of no without the warm progression of yes makes a cold and inflexible chamber. Indeed is the surge of blossoms that you get through an outstretched arm. No is the strong hand that projects a circle around you to ensure your existence.
But then how troublesome it very well may be to say no in a culture that respects the yes. We partner yes with the cheerful face, and the glad face is a divine being. We partner yes with the outgoing individual ideal: the individual who is consistently up for the party, the party time (there’s the word again), what our way of life calls “a happy time.” Yes is the individual who takes the path of least resistance, who expands herself indefatigably for her children, who prepares additional treats for the heat deal, and endeavors never to frustrate others.
There’s nothing intrinsically amiss with indeed, obviously. The issues emerge when you say yes yet you truly mean no, when you sideline that tranquil murmur that says, “I would actually prefer to remain at home in my night wear and watch a film.”